For most relationships, conflict and arguments are a natural part of the deal. But as long as you can resolve them, then there’s no need to worry whether you should break up. However, if you are noticing that the bad times are outweighing the good, you might be thinking that your relationship is headed for a dead end. While each circumstance is different, here are eight warning signs that you and your partner might not make it. If you notice any of these happening to you, ask yourself if you want to make things work, and talk to your partner about it. Otherwise, it could be time to cut your losses.
#1 You’re Heading in Different Directions
One of the biggest reasons that couples split up is that they both want different things. You want to pursue your career while your SO wants to settle and have children. Over time, these competing trajectories will pull you further away from each other, resulting in separation.
If you feel like this is happening, you have to understand that one of you will have to change your plans to match the other, or things will only get worse until a breakup is the only solution.
#2 You Spend Less Time Together
With this warning sign, you have to account for other factors to make sure that it is a result of a breakup brewing and not anything else. If work or other responsibilities are keeping you from spending as much time as you want, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to split up, but it means that you have to work a little harder.
Conversely, if you or your partner start making excuses not to see each other or don’t seem interested in spending time together, then it is a strong indicator that things are coming to an end. You should both be the highlight of each other’s day; not an obligation.
#3 You Hide Things From Each Other
Healthy communication is the cornerstone of any relationship, so once that starts to fade it will lead to all kinds of problems. If you aren’t talking to each other about important stuff, then it means that you don’t feel comfortable sharing things with your partner. The more you hide from each other, the wider the gap gets until you eventually separate.
#4 You Fight Over Nothing
This is another common indicator of a couple on the rocks. If your partner starts snapping at you or getting angry over little things, it could be a sign that there is something bigger brewing underneath. However, you also have to take other factors into consideration, such as what else is going on in your SO’s life.
At times, he or she may get irritable due to other circumstances, such as stress at work, hunger, exhaustion, or other issues. To help you understand the situation, talk to your partner about why he or she is lashing out and see if there is a solution that can be found. If your SO is unapologetic or blames you for the outbursts, then it probably means that a breakup is imminent.
#5 There is Growing Space Between You
This one is harder to quantify, but you know when it happens. Space occurs when you stop talking to each other and sharing information. Unfortunately, this problem seems to be cumulative and gets worse over time, meaning that you either have to quash it immediately or let it tear you apart. If you notice the space happening but don’t feel the urge to remedy the situation, then you should probably break up.
#6 You Don’t Feel the Same Way
If you are noticing that your partner doesn’t do it for you the way that he or she did before, then it could mean that your feelings have changed. If that happens, then you should be honest with yourself and your SO and come to terms with what is going on. Don’t ignore these feelings or keep them from your partner so as to spare their feelings, as it will only get worse. If you notice this happening, ask yourself why the sudden change and think carefully about how you truly feel about your SO.
#7 You Feel Like Breaking Up
If at any point you don’t feel like you want to be with your partner anymore, then you should cut your losses. Even if you have been together for a while or have other obligations (such as children), you don’t want to hide your feelings as they will only get stronger and cause either resentment or acts of rebellion (such as cheating). If you feel this way, talk to your SO and let him or her know what’s going on. It may hurt initially, but it’s far better to discuss it than to wait until things get so bad that you do something even worse.
#8 You’re Interested in Other People
Another primary indicator that you should break up with your current partner is if you start falling for someone else. Realistically, your SO should be the only one that stirs up feelings of love and adoration, but if you feel strongly for another person, it could mean that your relationship is not fulfilling your needs. What’s important here is to differentiate between love, lust, and a crush so that you don’t make any rash decisions. If you feel torn between your partner and a third party, then it’s important that you understand the underlying feelings that are driving this wedge between you. Also, find out how the other person feels, as you don’t want to break up to be with someone else who doesn’t feel the same way about you.